Search Results for “ass to mouth”

So I saw Miley Cyrus name on my assignments list and clicked on the photos with my eyes pre-rolled and my hand all ready to cover my mouth as I sarcastically yawned over Miley’s newest outrageous stunt and then I looked at the photos. Huh? Miley looks … classy again? Now this, Miley Cyrus – this is how it’s done. Keep us on our feet! Keep us guessing! Who’s gonna show up for the party? Slutty Miley? Classy Miley? Somewhere in between? I was just about to count Miley out as yet another teen star who struck out to present a more mature image and went to far with it only to find there was no going back. While I’m not ready to say Miley has avoided that yet, these photos are a great indication that there is still hope.

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Well, I suppose that makes sense. I seem to recall being surprised by pregnancy photos of Michelle Hunziker a few months back so it kind of follows that she would have a baby now. In these shots of Michelle leaving a hospital in Mailand though, I’m a little surprised to find myself a little underwhelmed by the shots. She looks happy, yes, but … eh. I’m just not feeling the photos overall. It looks to me like she’s excited to see the press and that always leaves a foul taste in my mouth. Ah well, I still love the girl. I’ll give her a pass on this one.

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I have that whole deal about giant sunglasses but Maria Menounos may have just shut my mouth because even I have to admit she looks pretty good rocking those giant shades. Am I bias because I adore Maria like she’s my big sister? Perhaps but the fact remains I’ve actually stumbled across pictures of a celebrity wearing the big shades that I actually think looks good in them which pretty much requires me to reevaluate my position on them entirely. Well played Maria. Anyway, enough about the shades. Let’s talk about Maria’s outfit. Honestly? I love it. She looks comfortable but sexy and I really think that’s what I like most about Maria. She’s effortlessly sexy. I love everything about this woman. I can’t wait to see her on “Dancing with the Stars”.

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I think it’s finally happened. I’ve been rendered speechless. Luckily (for me anyway), I can still type even while my mouth hangs open and drool puddles below my chin. Sophie Turner is so freaking hot. So hot. I don’t think there are enough words in the English language to adequately describe how hot she is. Stunning. Smoking. On fire. Sizzling. Steaming. Heart-stoppingly, mind-numbingly, eye-burningly smoking freaking hot. Exquisite. And then, because her simply being indescribably hot isn’t enough, she wears this costume for Halloween. That’s it. She’s trying to kill us all. This woman is dangerous. Those eyes and that ass are the only weapons she needs. I mean, I have all the same parts she has, but they don’t look right anymore. Ugh. I’m done. I need to look away while I still feel like I’m at least part of the same species.

 

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People like to find one flaw on a gorgeous celebrity and run wild with it. Is it jealousy? I can’t speak for the rest of the world but for me, yeah, it totally is. I want to be gorgeous and rich although the famous part just seems like a pain in the ass. Megan Fox has a weird thumb. Nicole Kidman has her frozen forehead. Paris Hilton has… well, Paris has a lot of things. Her weird jaw, her pointy nose. There’s a lot to choose from. What I can’t get passed though is those clown feet of hers. The rest of her looks pretty hot in these pictures, but I can’t take my eyes off her feet. Of course when she opens her mouth, you can add her vapid personality to the list but in pictures, it’s always the feet for me. I take solace knowing that in a world where Paris is better than me in just about every way imaginable, I at least have normal lady-sized feet.

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Get it? Because her band is called The Pretty Reckless. Yeah, lame, I know. Anyway, moving on. I don’t really know what I think of Taylor Momsen anymore. It seems like every move she makes is premeditated to make her look as bad ass as possible, but the more out there she gets, the more innocent I believe she is. Sure flashing her underage breasts on stage at one of her most recent gigs turned some heads. I, on the other hand, just rolled my eyes and yawned a little. It’s old news. This is what we know about Momsen. She has no problem talking about masturbation and her love for her vibrator. She blames her parents for her behavior because they pushed her into acting. I happen to think that’s probably the truest statement that’s ever come out of her mouth. That said, Taylor – performing here at The Academy in Manchester – is no more of a wild child that her pop culture counterpart, Miley Cyrus. The difference is Taylor wants you to think she’s as bad ass as Miley probably is. She isn’t though. She’s a little girl trying to play ball with the big kids – and she’s striking out. She comes across as a sad girl desperate for attention and I’m guessing that’s really closer to the truth.