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I really don’t know why I like Paris Hilton as much as I do. I really shouldn’t. She’s pretty much everything I hate in a celebrity. She’s arrogant, shallow and famous for being famous. Even so, I like her. I don’t think she’s actually all that attractive when compared to some of her contemporaries. Some could say she’s in the same class of celebrity as Kim Kardashian and I find Kim much more attractive. I also like Kim a lot less than Paris. So what gives? I don’t know. I guess I’m just complicated like that. Anyway, on to the photos. Here in Sao Paulo, Paris looks adorable. I love the two piece swim suit she’s wearing and I love the fact that she seems to be having a typically ‘Paris Hilton’ good time. While I don’t think I’d enjoy spending time with her, it is kind of fascinating to watch Paris being Paris and I suppose that appeals to me in a very strange way.

 

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Oh Paris Hilton. I want to hate you but I just can’t. There’s something about you I find endlessly interesting. Perhaps it’s the fact that you just sort of seem to trip through life with your head in the clouds, never really taking notice of what’s happening around you. Here in Hollywood, we get some what I like to call “Classic Paris”. Her dress is hiked up to her waist, there are cameras all around here but she seems blissfully unaware more upskirt shots are about to flood the internet. Paris Hilton. What a classy lady. Seriously though, I give Paris a hard time but I do like her. I don’t know why I like her and I feel a little dirty for it, but I do. I’m complex.

With the horribly sad passing of Amy Winehouse at 27 years old, many people have been wondering if Lindsay Lohan will be next. I am not going to participate in such morbid trash talk. From what those closest to Lindsay are saying, she’s really cleaned herself up. Here we have Lindsay posing after hanging out at Paris Hilton’s party, it would be easy to speculate as to what Lohan was up to at the party. I’m not going to bother. It’s none of my business and I sincerely hope the rumors are true and that Lindsay is getting her life back on track. She looks healthier than she has in a long time and I’m thrilled to see that. I wish her all the best and hope her road to recovery is as smooth as possible, not to mention successful. I want to see this girl make the comeback I’m confident she can make.

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People like to find one flaw on a gorgeous celebrity and run wild with it. Is it jealousy? I can’t speak for the rest of the world but for me, yeah, it totally is. I want to be gorgeous and rich although the famous part just seems like a pain in the ass. Megan Fox has a weird thumb. Nicole Kidman has her frozen forehead. Paris Hilton has… well, Paris has a lot of things. Her weird jaw, her pointy nose. There’s a lot to choose from. What I can’t get passed though is those clown feet of hers. The rest of her looks pretty hot in these pictures, but I can’t take my eyes off her feet. Of course when she opens her mouth, you can add her vapid personality to the list but in pictures, it’s always the feet for me. I take solace knowing that in a world where Paris is better than me in just about every way imaginable, I at least have normal lady-sized feet.

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While on their own, these pictures of Paris Hilton at the Supermartxe VIP Party at Fabrik disco in Madrid, Spain are pretty hot. She looks good, right? She’s got all the standard Paris Hilton poses included – the ‘hands behind her head checking out her own boobs’ pose, the ‘bending over and sticking out her ass as far as possible’ pose, the ‘grabbing her own ass to call attention to it’ pose – and on their own, things look fine. When you see her actually dancing though? The girl has no rhythm at all. I mean, she’s not Elaine from Seinfeld bad, but a lesson or two wouldn’t hurt her. Who am I kidding though? No one pays attention to how well she’s moving as long as she showing off tits, ass or both while she’s doing it. And we’re talking about Paris here, so she usually is.

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Hey everybody look! We can see what we’ve already seen a million times but this time covered (if you can call that covered) by a thin layer of material. Who cares anymore? I demand to know. Is this still shocking? Is this still news? Paris Hilton has an ass and she appears to be quite proud of it. I can’t entirely understand why, though. It’s not really all that spectacular. It’s clear Paris wants to get her name in the headlines again so she’s flashing her rear. And it worked. I’m writing about it right now. And it will continue to work. I just hope she gets over this little habit before she’s old and grey. No one wants to see that. Well, I suppose some people do. There’s a market for everything out there these days.

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